A celebration of creativity and life.
Over the course of several months, vivacious Adrienne Wilson succumbed to a cancer invading her body. I’d Rather Be Dead Than Deaf: A Young Woman’s Journey With Liver Cancer is a colorful snapshot in time as revealed through enthusiastic journal entries, artwork, poems, and observations. Just a teenager at the time of her diagnosis, this sparkling young girl shines as a beacon of positivity in a world where reality and negativity threaten to extinguish light and hope. Shortly after learning of her cancer, she wrote, “I’ve forgotten how to think negatively.” It is this blindingly bright worldview that endears readers to Adrienne and makes her story refreshing, despite the inevitable outcome. The power of this moving collection lies not in its ability to make you cry, which you will, but in its ability to make you smile through the tears. So much of Adrienne’s journal plays out like the experiences of every teenager. One day she loves meat, the next she’s a committed vegan. Her self-confidence is on shaky ground. She’s certain Dave Navarro is the coolest man on the planet. But through it all, her illness is always lingering in the shadows, waiting to steal the life of one of the kindest girls you could ever hope to meet. Raw emotion grips readers in unexpected ways. For example, an early journal entry says, “I am such a contradiction of myself.” Though most of us shared a similar self-sentiment in our teen years, Adrienne never got the benefit of time and perspective to sort through all her inner conflicts. Even as that reality weighs heavily, the tone of this collection remains bright and encouraging.
It is noteworthy that this isn’t simply a heart-wrenching story about a cancer victim. This is a celebration of creativity and life! Adrienne felt so much and lived with an enviable ferocity. She loved Wicca, art, the natural world, and the internet, a relatively novel concept in her day. She loved her family, her pets, and her friends. But at the top of the list of things she loved was music. This passion for music is evident in the title of this collection, as being unable to enjoy music was one of the few things ever to make her cry. Instead, this passionate girl focused on the good, on what cancer gave her, rather than took away from her. Defined cheekbones, a strawberry wig, a unique story, and the reassurance of her family’s love are a few of the things Adrienne gained from her trial. After all, “With every valley comes a mountain, lush and green.” Adrienne might be gone, but her voice carries loud and strong in I’d Rather Be Dead Than Deaf.